Friday Night Letter

Dear Mr Anheuser Busch,

Please allow me to tell you a story - I promise it has a happy ending.

I left a happy hour this afternoon, after having a great time with some friends, and decided to forego any other late night activities and make a quick trip to my old place, grab some to-go, and then head home to my new cozy condo to unpack and get a little more settled.

I ordered my favorite #1 with a coke at Whataburger, and made a quick stop at a gas station to pick up a 12 pack of Bud Light. I knew my new place was missing something, and it turns out that this was what it was.

I slowly unloaded the few things that I picked up from the old place, my yummy dinner, and headed upstairs.....anxious to enjoy my supper right as the evening storms blew in - I really do love a good thunderstorm. I got all settled, and opened up the bag....and saw a yellow wrapper holding my burger. Now, I've eaten enough times at Whataburger to know what a yellow wrapper means. It means that whatever is in that wrapper.....has cheese on it. So, I love cheese....but one place that I don't like cheese, is on my burgers......especially American cheese on a burger - ugh. So, I opened the wrapper, and sure enough, there was cheese. BUT.....that wasn't the worst part. It was two patties, two pieces of cheese, and nothing else. YUCK! The only reason I eat hamburgers is for all the veggies that come with it! I love the lettuce, pickles, tomatoes and especially the onions - awwww, the crunchy bites of a yummy burger......none of which were on this burger. I almost started to cry, but then I realized that there was still Fancy Ketchup to eat with the few fries left that I hadn't devoured on the drive, and maybe that could save the night. I opened one of the ketchups, and.............OMG!!!! It slipped out of my hand and flew across the floor! Right to under my couch!! But not before it squirted ALL over the carpet AND my couch. ARE.YOU.KIDDING.ME??? Ugh, now it's time to cry. This really blows.

So....the point of my story to you, Mister Anheuser Busch Man.....is that, after all of that disappointment, I still have your Bud Light invention to save my evening. I'm going to get in my PJs, pop some popcorn, sit on the couch, enjoy the storm and watch some terrible Friday night television and have a cold Bud Light.

If that bottle has been shaken and spills all over my new place, I might just lose it...so let's just hope that doesn't happen.

Your friend,
AP